---

every night

I tell myself

it wasn't my fault

but I remember when

you looked right through me

every time I'd come to visit

where have you gone?

I followed you to the roof

but I was in the wrong building

I watched as you jumped from afar

all in my nightmares

your train is leaving

and we will never see each other again

I've known you all my life

and you look right through me

I remember

when I'd visit the nursing home

I remember, I remember

it's been 3 years now

and I should have seen you more

this has relapsed my self hatred

I'm sorry

I'm sorry

please forgive me

please forgive me

I'm sorry that I've failed you

I'm sorry I'm not the man

you want me to be

if only I could tell you

how things have been

I wonder if you'd understand

all the changes I've made

are you watching over me?

do you see me?...