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Today I lay restless, hysterical, and nauseated beyond control.

Today is the day I was brought to this world, offering it nothing in return, a true condemnation.

Two years of pure fucking agony it has already been.

There’s nothing I want more than to see your luminous smile.

I know you didn’t want to leave.

We tried all we could, you tried your hardest.

Why would God have chosen you? It doesn’t make any sense.

You were so thoughtful, vigorous, and perfect.

I know you did not want to leave, why would God have chosen you?

6 months of misery for you has led to a wasted 45 years for me.

After 2 years of what I already thought could be the lowest my life can get, he won’t respond to me, nothing.

I yearn for a glimmer of hope, but I feel a my life has been stripped from me.

My life stripped from me, leaving me cold, empty, and worthless.

I don’t know what to do.

I reach out for help, society, hot lines, a deity.

No response, I’m worthless, I’m dead in everyone’s eyes.