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I will commit murder, but stretch its time

Because experimentation is not a crime

Needless testing with electric shock

A tormenting death is more time on the clock

I love the cleanly, smooth fine feel

Of that cold, hard sharpening steel

And I love the high from pushing in

With my razors through preserved skin

So do I adore live subjects to analyze

Fresh from crowded cages of compact size

With hardly any room for them to thrive

Ensures that they will not survive

My colleagues and I have got the grants

Because our methods are never scant

It costs a lot of money to power electrodes

To pump a monkey full of 10,000 volts

And so who cares? Do you? NOT ME!

Since my job's secure at the laboratory

Just drown out screams from horrific pain

with thoughts that this is for mankind's gain